Your daughter has always been a straight A student, excelling in classes over her classmates. She has become the top scorer for her high school’s basketball team. Her dance class is planning on taking a trip this summer to compete against other dance academies. She is a very likable girl and likes to make others happy.
However, she doesn’t seem to have a lot of friends anymore. You watch as she lets worries and anxieties take control of her life. If she is invited to attend an event, she will most likely turn down the invitation. She worries that her choice of clothing may not be acceptable or that she may say or do the wrong things around her peers. If she chooses to attend the party, she will obsess over what type of gift to bring. She will purchase several items and likely return all of them.
She turns down social invitations to go out with friends. Her grades are more important. She only got a 95% on the last Math exam. She cannot afford to take a night off of studying. She must bring that grade up. If she lets her grades drop anywhere below an A average, she may not get into a college.
She has began to lose interest in the basketball team and dance class. She worries that they may cause knee health problems, which may lead to a torn ligament, which may lead to surgery, which may lead to a wheelchair.
She spends a lot of her time worrying about your family’s safety. She may make family members call to say they’ve reached their destinations. If the fire whistle blows in the town, she immediately races to the phone to check on the status of her siblings. She avoids going for walks or bicycle rides because a car may lose control and hit her. She has no interest in getting her driver’s license. She fears that there are too many uncontrollable drivers on the roadway.
Her constant and extreme worrying has lead to severe social issues. Her friends no longer bother asking her to hang out. They know she will invent some extreme excuse. She gets nauseous and perhaps even vomits before heading to school. She fears the other students will judge her clothing or hair style. She also fears even raising her hand in class. If she were to say the wrong answer, the teacher would hold that against her throughout the entire school year.
Her worrying has now begun to cause physical symptoms. You hear her tossing and turning in her bed throughout the night. Her mind will not quit racing from one situation to the next. Her worries and fears take over and she sits up in bed, her heart racing. As she falls asleep, the worries find a way into her dreams. In the morning, she will wake up to analyze if the events in her dreams could happen. Her lack of sleep is causing extreme fatigue.
You begin to realize that your daughter no longer has the same normal fears and worries of teens her age. She has Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), which causes extreme anxiety and worry in teens and adults. When presented with possible outcomes she obsesses about the worst possible scenario. She has let her fears and worries overtake her life.
Stepping in and helping your teen understand that her worrying is usually pointless and excessive may help. You can try to work through scenarios with her. Discuss the possible scenarios and the chances of a positive event happening rather than a negative one.
She may also benefit from learning breathing and meditation techniques. When faced with a stressful situation, these techniques may help alleviate some of the stress. She may have lost the ability to calm herself down. It can be beneficial for her to use her senses to hone in and calm herself down. She may increase her sensitivity to touch by petting her cat. She may use her hearing to listen to soothing sounds such as a waterfall.
Using self calming and soothing techniques can often help alleviate some of your teen’s stress and worry. However, many teens need help and guidance to overcome their GAD. By talking about their worries and fears, they can often critical think and work them out. However, many teens may be reluctant to discuss their thoughts with a family member.
You may want to consider sending your child to a boarding school that has skilled and experienced professionals that will listen to and help work through your teen’s thoughts. New Creations Boarding School can offer 24 hour supervision and “minister” sessions. They choose to “minister” their students rather than counsel. They often find that with many issues, like GAD, counseling becomes too formal and a teen’s defenses go up.
Of course, some worries and fears are normal and expected. However, if your teen’s worrying and fears have passed the point of normal and are severely affecting many aspects of his or her life, please visit www.newcreationsboardingschool.org to learn about their academic, athletic, and extracurricular programs tailored to a student’s individual needs.
New Creations Boarding School is a Christian boarding school for youth located in Richmond, Indiana. New Creations serves teens from all around the world. Contact the director, Jeff Raatz, at (765) 935-2790 to schedule a campus visit.
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